August 2, 2009

Feeling Squarky in the Temple

Don't mock at me when you hear me say that I felt Squarky while I was in the Temple. It was Friday July 31th, the day before we returned to Shanghai that I went to the Temple again. There are days that I miss him more than other days. That day was the day.

In the Temple, I pondered the roller coaster ride we have been through since this year - how we moved to Shanghai with Squarky, how Squarky left us suddenly on this foreign land leaving us empty-hearted and countless nights of tears, and then how shockingly we found out that I was pregnant. It was when my heart was full of gratitude that I thank God for giving us such a wonderful good dog and I asked God to hear my crying heart again that I miss our furry boy so much, that right moment I felt clearly that Squarky is somewhere else alive and kicking. I just can not see where he is. I miss him so much. I pray that Squarky knows that we will never forget him and we love him and miss him and can't wait to see him again.

I thank the Lord for that special moment He has given me that I was with our unborn baby sitting in the celestial room full-heartily knowing what I am taught and believe is true and that I will see people whom I love and gone before me again one day. And I know Squarky will jump on us and give us his signature long-tongue wet kiss again one day.


April 25, 2009

A journey ends where it began 緣起緣落

I never liked dogs. To say it more precisely I was totally afraid of dogs. In my mind, dogs meant dirty, germs and most importantly, they bite. It was a wet afternoon after a often-seen thunderstorm of any summer days in Taipei, a huge German Shepard came out of no where to chase me on my way home from a extracurricular class. I was about 8 or 10. I was also tiny and skinny in my age. A small umbrella, the kind of one kids use, was the only thing I had in my hands to beat off that German Shepard's sharp teeth. I screamed out of my lung and waved the umbrella crazily to fight for my life. Finally, an adult came by and rescued me from the horror. From that day, I had fear for dogs.

Tim knew well that I hated dogs when he married me. He had seen enough my paranoid moments with dogs before he proposed. He once said to me that a dog makes a family complete and happy. I knew he was begging for one. It was the year of 2003, I felt I can't forever say no to dogs for the sake of the fact that I have married to a man who grew up with two dogs and still have tears in his eyes when he talked about them. My heart couldn't take one more that sad puppy dog eye look he cast to me whenever we saw a dog. One day I crisply announced" "I am ready!". "Ready for what?" Tim puzzled. "OK, we can get a dog." I confirmed with a secret hope that it may come to me to like dogs later but not now yet. As for Tim, my "permission" was like a merciful rain after long drought although he had a good amount of doubts in me until now.

Before we saw a classified in the Dallas Morning News said " English Cocker Spaniel puppies for sale", we had tried to contact with several reputable breeders in Texas but all ended with no lucks - mostly due to breeders had no litters avaiable at that moment or at any time soon. So, we gave this ad a daring try.

Squarky was born in a nice ranch home in Waco Texas. When we saw him, he was the last one standing in his litter. His breeder kept a pack of his kind as family pets as well as handy hunting companions. Squarky might sense that he was the last one standing and we came here for him so that he pretty much squirmed up right away from where he rested to Tim's front arm when we reached out to him. That was a clever move as Tim's heart was instantly melted and the decesion was already made. From the day one, Squarky was a brown-noser of genius.

We made a second trip to go back to bring Squarky home when he was old enough to come home with us. It was such a special day that we will never forget, not only because it was Tim's birthday (Squarky was Tim's birthday present), but we knew that this blue-eye little furry thing was going to count on us to the end of his life. This is not it yet. Speaking today from a hindsight, what we did not expect then was that we were bringing home a special comforting angel who was going to change our life and bless us greatly.


April 24, 2009

Squarky's Profile 認識果果

Breed: Cocker Spaniel (English Cocker Spaniel)

Color: Black and white with a lot of freckles

Birthday: March 16, 2003

Adoption date: April 25, 2003 (I was my dad's birthday gift)

Crossed Rainbow Bridge on January 26, 2009

AKC Name: Sharp's Captain Moroni (if you don't know who "Captain Moroni" is, you should go read the Book of Mormon!)

Common Name: Squarky or 果果 (pronounced "guo-guo") or Monster

Weight and height: I was shorter and chubbier than you expect for a normal English Cocker :). My muscles were so chunky, juicy and athletic that my parents considered me as part of family's "emergency food storage". :)

I was ....a friendly, merry,goofy,chunky spoiled rotten with a eternal-wagging tail who was bossy and demanding to my parents but was devastatly submissive to all others...highly intelligent and only did things that made sense to me. I've successfully turned my mom from a dog despiser to a dog maniac.

I liked....chasing birds, rabbits and and I ate everything I saw...riding in the car...running with dad...playing hide-and-seek...stealing socks...cuddling with mom and dad...passing silent-but-deadly gas and ran away from it...

I didn't like...vacumn machine...getting toe nails cut...taking baths...being alone...

I was diagnosed with epilepsy and took Phenobarbital pills twice a day since I was two.


February 9, 2009

一隻狗的最後遺囑與見證 ~ by Eugene O'Neill

昨晚第一次夢見果果, 他嘴裡叼著他的football向我飛撲過來, 活蹦亂跳一如往昔, 全身上下的freckles一樣的鮮明可愛, 只有一點是特別奇怪的, 就是他的兩隻大耳朵被盤起扎在頭頂上成了個小啾啾, 我還特地上前查看會不會綁得太緊, 結果並沒有, "有人"用了一個有小熊圖案的髮圈鬆鬆地將果果的耳朵盤起. 如往日般, 我在他鼻頭上那排成一橫線的三點小斑點上親了親, 再拍拍他有著小啾啾的頭, 似乎對於我眼前所看到的一切滿意. 真是個好怪(他的新造型) 但又令我很興奮的一個夢, 看來果果現在的確有人在照顧著他!

諾貝爾文學獎得主美國劇作家Eugene O'Neill於1940年狗兒子Blemie自然壽終之際, 寫下了"The Last Will and Testament of Silverdene Emblem O'Neill"以安慰他的妻子, 真是一篇慰藉失去犬子女人士的好作品, 我想果果也會有和Blemie一樣的想法. 果果雖然壯年骤逝, 但是在他六年的生命裡, 每分鐘都活的盡情精采, 捫心自問, 我們真的給了他所有的愛與照顧, 只嘆生命的短暫.

The Last Will and Testament of Silverdene Emblem O'Neill

I, Silverdene Emblem O'Neill (familiarly known to my family, friends and acquaintances as Blemie), because the burden of my years is heavy upon me, and I realize the end of my life is near, do hereby bury my last will and testament in the mind of my Master. He will not know it is there until I am dead. Then, remembering me in his loneliness, he will suddenly know of this testament, and I ask him then to inscribe it as a memorial to me. I have little in the way of material things to leave. Dogs are wiser than men. They do not set great store upon things. They do not waste their time hoarding property. They do not ruin their sleep worrying about objects they have, and to obtain the objects they have not. There is nothing of value I have to bequeath except my love and my faith. These I leave to those who have loved me, to my Master and Mistress, who I know will mourn me most, to Freeman who has been so good to me, to Cyn and Roy and Willie and Naomi and — but if I should list all those who have loved me it would force my Master to write a book. Perhaps it is in vain of me to boast when I am so near death, which returns all beasts and vanities to dust, but I have always been an extremely lovable dog. I ask my Master and Mistress to remember me always, but not to grieve for me too long. In my life I have tried to be a comfort to them in time of sorrow, and a reason for added joy in their happiness. It is painful for me to think that even in death I should cause them pain. Let them remember that while no dog has ever had a happier life (and this I owe to their love and care for me), now that I have grown blind and deaf and lame, and even my sense of smell fails me so that a rabbit could be right under my nose and I might not know, my pride has sunk to a sick, bewildered humiliation. I feel life is taunting me with having over lingered my welcome. It is time I said good-by, before I become too sick a burden on myself and on those who love me. It will be sorrow to leave them, but not a sorrow to die. Dogs do not fear death as men do. We accept it as part of life, not as something alien and terrible which destroys life. What may come after death, who knows? I would like to believe with those of my fellow Dalmatians who are devout Mohammedans, that there is a Paradise where one is always young and full-bladdered; here all the day one dillies and dallies with an amorous multitude of houris, beautifully spotted; where jack-rabbits that run fast but not too fast (like the houris) are as the sands of the desert; where each blissful hour is mealtime; where in long evenings there are a million fireplaces with logs forever burning and one curls oneself up and blinks into the flames and nods and dreams, remembering the old brave days on earth, and the love of one's Master and Mistress. I am afraid this is too much for even such a dog as I am to expect. But peace, at least, is certain. Peace and long rest for weary old heart and head and limbs, and eternal sleeps in the earth I have loved so well. Perhaps, after all, this is best. One last request I earnestly make. I have heard my Mistress say, "When Blemie dies we must never have another dog. I love him so much I could never love another one." Now I would ask her, for love of me, to have another. It would be a poor tribute to my memory never to have a dog again. What I would not like to feel is that, having once had me in the family, now she cannot live without a dog! I have never had a narrow jealous spirit. I have always held that most dogs are good (and one cat, the black one I have permitted to share the living-room rug during the evenings, whose affection I have tolerated in a kindly spirit, and in rare sentimental moods, even reciprocated a trifle). Some dogs, of course, are better than others. Dalmatians, naturally, as everyone knows, are best. So I suggest a Dalmatian as my successor. He can hardly be as well bred, or as well mannered or as distinguished and handsome as I was in my prime. My Master and Mistress must not ask the impossible. But he will do his best, I am sure, and even his inevitable defects will help by comparison to keep my memory green. To him I bequeath my collar and leash and my overcoat and raincoat, made to order in 1929 at Hermes in Paris. He can never wear them with the distinction I did, walking around the Place Vendome, or later along Park Avenue, all eyes fixed on me in admiration; but again I am sure he will do his utmost not to appear a mere gauche provincial dog. Here on the ranch, he may prove himself quite worthy of comparison, in some respects. He will, I presume, come closer to jackrabbits than I have been able to in recent years. And, for all his faults, I hereby wish him the happiness I know will be his in my old home. One last word of farewell, Dear Master and Mistress. Whenever you visit my grave, say to yourselves with regret but also with happiness in your hearts at the remembrance of my long happy life with you: "here lies one who loved us and whom we loved." No matter how deep my sleep I shall hear you, and not all the power of death can keep my spirit from wagging a grateful tail.


February 6, 2009

塵歸塵, 土歸土

我對著似無邊際的大海高問: 寶貝蛋, 你也在想我們嗎?





January 27, 2009

Wallet was stolen




娘的皮夾裡有現金, 所有的重要卡片證件, 娘的爹(你外公)的照片, 爹娘的訂婚合照, 爹娘認養的住在柬埔寨的姐姐的照片(她和你的生日是同一天, 很巧吧!), 還有一堆拉里拉雜在上海生活常用的幫手與資訊


January 26, 2009

Goodbye, my baby!

We love you very much
You are a good-good boy


  © Free Blogger Templates Spain by 2008

Back to TOP